Knowing the difference between flattery and a compliment can mean the difference between creepy and charming. Flattery is excessive, insincere praise with some ulterior motive behind it. A compliment expresses praise and respect and can make a world of difference. Here are a few ways to compliment your date and really show your appreciation of her.
1. Be Honest
The central point of complimenting a woman properly is being sincere about it. If you don’t think she is the smartest person you’ve ever met, then don’t say it and don’t try to cover up your insincere comment with another. It makes you look even more suspicious. The last thing you want to do is to come off as not being honest because even when you say something you do mean, she won’t believe you.
2. Eyes Up
If you want a woman to think you’re a creep, stare at her check or other suggestive body parts while you’re talking to her. It’s disturbing and could land you in a lot of trouble personally and legally. Yes, it’s true, men are visual creatures. But unlike the animals, they can control themselves and their actions. When you compliment her, keep your eyes on hers and see tip number one.
3. Pay Attention
General comments like “you are smart” are what some women have come to expect. It’s nonspecific and unsurprising. You can learn a lot about how to compliment a woman by paying attention and following up with certain details. For example, when she makes a remark that makes you laugh, mention how you appreciate her sense of humor.
4. Beware of Crossing Lines
Most women are particularly sensitive about their looks. In cases where she has made significant changes in her appearance, it’s best to err on the side of caution. For example, if you notice something about her appearance it’s never a good idea to ask if her nails or hair are real. Not only does it come off as creepy but it can be easily taken as an insult. There is no redeeming value in crossing that line and in the long run, it can hurt your reputation.
In sales, there’s a saying: “there’s money in the sale but there’s a fortune in the follow-up.” There’s nothing wrong with a quick compliment and a smile but if you’re interested in getting to know her, taking the conversation further can be a good thing. If you genuinely enjoyed something she said or did, that’s an opportunity to start a conversation and learn more. If you’re sincere and respectful about what you say to her, it can open the right doors.